Hello!

 As we all know, I am terrible at the blog thing. Thats just how it is. The past year and a half has brought many ups and downs, and has been such an emotional Rollercoaster.  We added little robin to the family in May of 2019. How hes 1 already i dont even know because time flew by! 

I'll add pictures when I can get to my computer! 

He has the bluest eyes and such a fun personality! The day we brought him home from the hospital is a day ill never forget. I dont remember the times clearly,  but the events that took place are still embedded in my mind. We got home and took a nap, the first train that went by i was out like light. Apparently it had been too quiet at the hospital.  

When I woke up I checked my phone, and saw my mom had tried calling. Frsring what I knew was to come, as grandpa Scott had been on his end of life care, I called her back right away. She told me he had an estimated couple days left and to get there to say our goodbyes. We got off the phone, and I was telling my husband we needed to go, when my phone rang again, this time my mom letting me know grandpa was gone. It was a matter of minutes.  

Grandpa passing set of a whirlwind of emotions, some I didnt even realize I was experiencing.  I miss my grandpa terribly, Every single day. 

I was 1 week post- party and instead of taking time tourist and heal from having a baby, we were up and running with funeral stuff. I dont think I ever properly healed, and had some health issues ill mention a little later on. 

June of 2019 brings us to my moms reunion. Kicked off with fireworks a couple days before for founders day, and then BBQ dinner and waterslide for my birthday. My siblings and i all camped out at moms, and took turns planning the meals and activities for each day. We had park play. Card and board games,  we played quidditch (if you're a Harry potter fan, you know!) And water balloon volleyball! We went to the splash pad. And ended with the last day of mom reunion part 1, with a walk in the rain. 

Part 2 of mom sandy reunion was the annual fourth of july grt together in Idaho with my moms family. Every year is a different and 2019 was arcade! So many fun activities my family came up with and its the same level.of amazement every year! You had angry birds, and road runner, riding mower races (I can't fornthe life of me remember the game!) We had quidditch, and battle ship. A blast like always!! 

Fast forward to October 2019. I starting noticing some things with my health, that had me concerned enough to make an appointment. After some blood work and the initial visit we discovered that I have severe anxiety, at the time it was severe post partum depression (it has stayed and depression sucks), we also found out  i was deficient in vitamins, and i was anemic.  We started on some meds for everything, and my health improved a little bit. 

In December I started noticing some other issues. I got with my midwife come January, after gopkng things would correct on their own, and she referred me to an obgyn within the same practice, so we could figure out what was going on. He discovered that I had an anterior prolapse, and a posterior prolapse. After an ultra sound  to see how severe it was, it was also discovered i had a uterine prolapse as well. 

My husband and I opted for surgery. Instead of PT which MAY or MAY NOT have worked. And wound up surgery any ways. January 30, I had a hysterectomy  at the age of 31. No going back to have a tubal undone to add more babies, robin is the end of the line on the baby front, but im okay with it. Im happy where our family is at. 

In February we added a puppy to the family! Oakley is a German shepard/Australian shepard mix, and sooooo spoiled!  

March 2020 is when things get crazy!! My step grandpa passed away. We had recently heard of covid-19, but the severity of it was unknown at the time. After the funeral we went to my moms for my sisters and nieces birthday dinner. While there I got notification of the soft closure for schools. Both of my school age kiddos  were upset, sad and confused. We didn't know where this all would take us, or how we would finish out the school year.

 i had my post op- more issues and another small surgery to fix. Surgery was on my paizlees birthday and she was mad. After surgery I developed a cough that wouldn't go away. I finally made an appointment with my doctor, and was sent for a CT scan to check for pneumonia and blood clots. I received the covid-19 test while there as well. 

Results came back, no blood clots in my lungs, but I did have pneumonia.  It hurt to breathe. I was put on antibiotics, and an inhaler.  My covid results came back a few days later as negative. But ever since breathing has been a chore. I feel like i can't ever get a good deep breath in. But im here and im alive. 

April and may were interesting with remote learning for school. My kids have anxiety like I do, and they dont do well with change at all. How we were able to finish out the year is a miracle. And its with many thanks to understanding teachers! 

April also brought on the dreaded word of quarantine.  No leaving home unless absolutely necessary. Grocery store runs. No family gatherings. That part killed me. I tried to see my mom and siblings as often as I could. BUT I couldn't risk anything,  not having a highrisk 3 year old with a respiratory condition. 

Little robin turned one in may! He already walking like crazy, starting to run. He loves to play cats and dogs, he ruffs, pants and meows. He loves his dinosaurs (they go vroom) and his cars (the go roar) often times ill sit outside the boys room and just listen to all the kids play. 

June brought on the death of my 3rd grandpa. My grandpa neeley. A funeral during this covid stuff is different, and weird, and I hate this new normal of mandatory masks everywhere. This is 3 deaths i  the family alone within a year.  

Our annual fourth of July in idaho was canceled. The decision was made as there are nermous high risk members of the family, and its a risk nobody wanted to take. Needless to say, i miss my extended family like crazy. 

We go to my moms now. Its one of the few places I take my kids, because I know its SAFE. If anyone feels sick at all they stay away because my mom and grandma are high risk as well. Grocery runs are done alone, once my husband is home from work. This new normal, I hate it. 

July also brought on the news of another death in my family. All 3 the year on my dads side. 4 within just over a year in family alone. My cousin committed suicide. It was completely unexpected as everytime insaw him, he was as happy as could be. But being one the suffers from depression, I know how often one has to put on the happy act, and we will never truly know the reasoning behind his 

And on that note I guess thats the quick rundown of whats gone on the past year. Life happens, and it changes so fast! Dont take it for granted. Make that phone call. Visit when you can. Make those memories.